Sustainability of Self…

 

I’ve been having this incredibly detailed dreams. My dreams are usually pretty immersive, but, lately, they have been like living another life. Or three, or four, in one night.

Not sure what the (practical) explanation is. Or even what message they are trying to tell me. A few are more simple, but also just as confusing. Because they’re dreams, yet they seem to be building a connection with…something. And, my rational side is saying “They’re just dreams, you tw*t.” *laugh*

So, I woke up after another parallel dimension dream, and felt a bit blue. More than usual, anyway.

Wondering about the place of humans on this planet, when humans just seem to be destroying everything they touch. And where my place in all this madness is. I’ve always been sort of activist-orientated…outspoken, my actions geared towards fighting social injustice, saving animals by the truckloads, loving wild plants and trees that embody the spirit of kismet and serendipity that are perfect symbols of resistance against stereotypical human desire for order and control.

Can it be possible to pull ourselves and our world back from the brink? The geographical history of the planet says yes–because our time (humans, that is) on this planet will be but a blink in the eye of the earth’s life span.

I’ve sort of renewed small ways to reinvent my life…annoyingly slow baby steps for someone as aggressively proactive as myself…but (without seeming like I’m trying to get your pity)…this current life transition has been pretty intense, even for one well-used to chaotic shifts and subsequent rebuilding. And, I just feel like I’ve made so many mistakes–taken wrong paths, and made some not-so-right choices.

I’ve restarted the process of downsizing my books. I’m attempting to meditate. I’m taking  a good, hard look of where I got off track with my life (another way to look at it, is figuring out what path I need to be on.). I’m trying to get rid of a lot of inner baggage, and bring myself back in tune with the things that are important to me and to this planet–nature, animals, conservation, plants.

Arrgh, I’m not explaining this very well, because it’s still sort of emotion- and instinct-based and a little muddled up in my head.

Especially when it feels like the planet and its inhabitants doesn’t have time for me to be stuck in an egocentric/ego-gratifying pool of introspection. (Not that I think I’m going to be the sole person that’s going to save the world, mind you!)

But something does need to shift on a consciousness level within myself in order to help change the world. However small that change is. Whether it’s meditation, action, ass-kicking, healing, opening one’s self to the world around us–I’m still trying to rebuild my toolkit to restore balance in a self and a world that feels like it’s gone mad.

A poetic tweet that was posted from a public figure made all the difference in my little world this morning. They’re probably used to being in the spotlight, but I would feel awkward in posting the link here, but it really gave me a pick-up-me regarding unlimited possibilities of spirit and self. I’ll leave that post to serendipity’s magic for others to find.

Going to try this out in a bit, courtesy of the Forest and Crow blog I follow: https://forestandcrow.com/2016/07/23/20-things-to-be-grateful-for-a-written-meditation-for-restoration/

Now, go out, be mindful of all creatures and growy things (even “weeds”), and change yourselves, and the world, while you’re at it.

 

(Feel free to share mindfulness, consciousness-raising, and other mindfulness techniques in the comments below.)

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Author: The Chaos Realm

Copy Editor/Proofreader, Historian, Freelance Writer, Virtual Assistant.

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